The Dangers of Paranoia

[jamesq]

I've always had a problem with paranoia. Not the full-blown conspiracy-theorist-tin-foil-hat variety, just an aspect of my low self-esteem. Think of it as a habit of combining the question "What's the worst that could happen" with a vivid imagination.

I've been dreading this year's salary review at work, utterly convinced that my being fired was only a matter of time. It got so bad that I was seriously thinking about following The Brain out to Scotland. The assumption being that as soon as I got fired I'd have to hustle to grab a job out there.

The salary review was five minutes ago. I got a raise. I really need to learn how to relax.

Comments

[garething.livejournal.com]

That'll learn ya!

Congrats...

[http://users.livejournal.com/-grog-/]

First, congratulations on the raise - that's always nice to see.


Second, I've never had a year where I've "looked forward" to review time - every slightly paranoid fantasy I can come up with comes up in my mind, and a few new ones just for giggles.

Nothing like last year.

[nosarious.livejournal.com]

I am 'blessed' with two managers at work. One manager is more relaxed than the other. He even lets us raid the concierge at three in the morning (but not for beer, unless you just happen to pop in on the way home)

Last years review was three hours of watching the other manager talk to his hands. It wasn't until a week later that someone told me it was three hours long. It happened at a fairly low point in my life and resulted in a severe depression.

I got a raise, but that was only because the other boss was in charge of it. The manager in question, however, has since been disciplined for several other mishandlings.

I tell ya, that was one of the times in my life where I really needed a hug or a cat purring in my lap. I stopped focusing so much on work now. It's not a place I spend my time at, just a place I hang my hat.