Messing With Mormons

[jamesq]

There I was walking home from the CO-OP with groceries when what do I see coming my way? Two well-dressed, clean cut, young men wearing name badges proclaiming that they are Elder Ezekiel and Elder Nathaniel. Swell, I think, here we go again.

They motion for me to stop as I'm passing. I do so and take off my headphone.

"Could we help you with your bags?"
"That's alright, I think I can manage."
"Well then, can we share a message of Jesus' love with you?"
"No. God is evil, and it would be immoral to worship a being who has brought so much misery and suffering to the world."

They had some kind of response to that but I had replaced my headphone and was walking away from them at this point.

Sometimes I can be a real prick. :D

Comments

[petranef.livejournal.com]

*snicker* Go, you! :D

Elders

[slavewench.livejournal.com]

*grin* Oohhh...let me tell you of my first experience meeting Mormons. I was living in Calgary (my first residence right after I moved there) when these two hot men come to the door asking if they can give me sessions on god, blah blah.

Basicly I thought.. okay.. I get to learn about a different religion (which I'm into doing) and hang around with two hot men. Yippie! So my roommates at the time said they were interested in sitting in too because they've taken Morman sessions 3 times prior and like disproving them.

Then they find out that one of the Elders was in Amway (like they were) and basicly... umm... my roommates converted and it's all my fault.

I ended up moving out fairly quickly after that when they had church meeting nights & I wasn't allowed to use the kitchen (because that makes noise). Basicly - I wasn't allowed to cook in a place that I pay rent in. WTF.

So yeah...I inadvertantly converted my roommates. Oops. *grin* I ran away screaming from the Elders in the other direction *twitch* *shudder*. I had never seen an "Elder" before and hadn't heard the term before either - I had no idea what it meant until the sessions. Blah!

Re: Elders

[jamesq]

I'm not sure what the title "Elder" means. I thought it meant you had completed your first proselytising mission. Kermie tells me it's after you've converted someone succesfully. I joked about them being called "Elder Ezekiel" and "Elder Nathaniel", but only one of them was an Elder.

I have a theory they send them out in pairs so that they don't accidentally get converted to something else while they're out there in the big bad world. I would certainly brag about it if I managed to turn a Mormon into an Athiest.

Re: Elders

[slavewench.livejournal.com]

I asked about the pairs thing. Apparently they used to go out alone but one day an Elder (or whomever, it was a guy) was alone in a house with a woman and she claimed he assaulted her while giving her a "session".

So since then they go in two's for both their protection & the people they see. Also - they wouldn't speak to me alone for the info sessions - I had to have someone there or at least in the house because I am a woman.

[garething.livejournal.com]

When I lived in Vancouver I knew a Mormon guy who worked with me. Eddie was ok, I suppose, if a little over-zealous in his faith. I blame this on his being a convert to Mormonism from Catholicism, which somehow tends to breed zealotry.

Anyways, he took it into his head to convert me. "Do you want to go to Hell?" he'd ask... "Don't you want to feel the joy of Jesus' love for you?" He even gave me a copy of the Book of Mormon, which I used to balance a table. One time he invited me to attend a meeting of the cult with him, at the Harbour Center. Lots of Mormons there, and me in full-on metal mode, with black t-shirt and long hair and looking like a general hooligan. It was amusing, to say the least. We spent the next few hours talking about the various things they'd said in the meeting. I don't remember details now, but it was generally me picking a point and saying, "What the hell was up with that?", Eddie getting defensive, and me never ever getting invited back.

What can I say? I'm a godless heathen.