jamesq | Having a Ball

"What are the mating habits of ping pong balls?"

The first thing you have to understand about ping pong balls is that they don't mate to produce offspring. This is impossible because all ping pong balls are male (this is self-evident - they're nothing but testicle).

This doesn't stop them from mating - in fact, ping pong balls have a very active sex life owing to the fact that all ping pong balls are also gay. We know this because of the following maxim: :

"It's not gay unless the balls touch."

Not that there's anything wrong with that.

Anyway, ping pong balls are always touching, running against each other, bouncing up and down, etc. Given their lack of extremities, the amount of vigor in their sex lives is remarkable. Anyone who has witnessed a lottery drawing (49 balls in a transparent bin, all bumping and grinding against each other) knows that they have frequent orgies.

Gay sex, group sex, they couldn't get much kinkier, but consider this: They're also into being paddled:
Take it, bitch, take it!!