A Pair of Minor Epiphanies

[jamesq]

1) Don't whine unless you're willing to do something in addition to the whining. Hence this morning's run.

2) While running, I thought about the fact that I wasn't in the shape I was last October when I ran the half-marathon. I'm at a point where I can run for about a kilometer and a half without a break. With breaks (about a minute of walking between each 1-1/2 Km segment) I can probably do 10 Km. Enough to finish next weekend's Forzani's Race, though I won't be setting any personal bests.

I might be irritated by the fact that I can't run as well as today as I did six months ago, but I don't view it as a moral failing. That I will have to go through thresholds of improvement is not, in my mind, anything other then an acknowledgment of simple facts. I have to get to the point where I can run two km straight, then five, then ten, then push the overall distance up to 22 km if I want to do the run again six months from now (and I do).

Weight-loss, OTOH, I don't see the same way. Losing 40 pounds (again), then 45, then 50, etc. all the way up to an eventual 70 pounds off seems like a Sisyphean task. Partly because I haven't actually achieved it even once yet, whereas I've gone from can-barely-walk-due-to-injury to 10 km non-stop multiple times in the last ten years. Partly because I worry that no matter how hard I try, If I ever do fall back to square one, that I'm doomed to stay there. And of course there are all the toxic "reasons" I outlined previously.

Intellectually, there should be no difference between the two. In both cases I'm training the body to push it's limits in the direction of better health. I know that the simple facts of physics will eventually have the response I want. My brain knows this. My heart thinks of them differently. As a good little INTP that's identified the mental problem I have to believe my brain. To hell with my lying emotions.

Comments

[conejita-diabla.livejournal.com]

Maybe it's just a matter of trying not to think about the weight loss aspect? Just focus on getting your running back up, and deal with that and that alone for a while. It's easier (for me at least) to change routine one area at a time...

[jamesq]

I agree. However, it's sometimes hard to concentrate on draining the swamp when you have to keep swatting alligators.

[snooness2]

:)
Glad to hear you are in better spirits.

There is a certain biological component to weight loss/gain. If you concentrate on the exercise and eating a balanced diet... the weight will be what it's going to be. But you will be healthier.

I noticed something in your post that you had gotten down to five pounds away from your ideal weight... did you ever consider that five pounds is the difference from an athletic active weight and a non-athletic one.

.... but like I'm one to talk....

However, the above is advice from some very very athletic biochemistry profs that taught us the fats/protein portion of biochem. They took quite a bit of time explaining how weight loss occurs in humans on the scientific cellular level and on a more general level (because it was an interesting, and relevant example to use for most of the students).
Their advice was
1) Don't eat crap that's processed, and don't eat out often. But of the non-processed food eat a bit of everything.
2) exercise regularly using a combination of strength and aerobic exercise
3) don't worry about the numbers on the scale - they take care of themselves if you do the other two things.
4) if you want to loose it's more important to exert rather then cut intake.

:)
(Please don't take this wrong... it's meant as encouragement and it's not trying to tell you what to do.)

[(Anonymous)]

You also have to consider the best way to lose weight, is a healthy diet and lots of cardiovascular exercise, if you focus on running an do it more you will probably have a much easier time losing the weight you want to. Achieving the one goal will make the other that much easier.

[thebrucie.livejournal.com]

That was well said. By me.