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Wednesday was my cataract surgery. I was anxious as hell to get it done, in both senses of the term. First, I wanted it done because the cataract had gotten to the point where I was effectively blind in my left eye. I was seriously thinking about wearing an eye patch because it was fucking with my vision so much that my right eye couldn't compensate anymore. I was bumping into things I could see, and putting things down on the counter a few inches short of the counter's edge.
I was also anxious because someone was going to stick things in my eye, and remove key bits of it.
So quick background: Cataracts is a disease of the eye's lens, the part behind the cornea/iris/pupil. The tissue gets made wrong and turns into a cloudy hard substance instead of the clear and flexible substance that it normally is. The current fix is to dilate the holy hell out of the eye so the iris is out of the way, then stick a tiny ultrasound/vacuum into the lens, liquify it with the ultrasound and suck it out with the vacuum. Once that's done, an artificial lens is inserted into the space left behind. That lens isn't perfect, but it's pretty good - I'll just need glasses to read or to see far away. Basically, I have a focal point set a few feet ahead of me. Perfect for working on a computer.
I walked to the clinic and got put through the conveyor belt. At one point I speak to the anesthesiologist, who gives a squirt of some anti-anxiety med under my tongue. He also checked out my vitals with some monitor that measured blood pressure (a little high), pulse (normal) and oxygen (dead average). Of note, the machine could also measure "pain" according to the user interface.
I did find out that the method they use for measuring oxygen was first developed for Japanese fighter pilots in WWII so they wouldn't black out. That was cool.
Naturally they put a local anesthetic on the eye. This removes pain, but notably doesn't remove other sensations. They said that I'd feel pressure and it might be uncomfortable. I liken this to the dentist saying something might pinch. They're not wrong - they're just really underselling it.
So here's how the procedure went. I laid down and they made me comfortable. Then they put a cloth over my face that had a hole cut out for the eye (I was asked at each stage which eye, which reassures me - not exactly something you want them fucking up at). They then clamped my eye open so like in A Clockwork Orange. Dr V. came in and described what he was doing in "you're going to feel X" terms just before X occurred. I felt a sensation on my eye that was deeply uncomfortable. You know how uncomfortable becomes pain when you turn it up past a certain point. Well this was uncomfortable well past that point without the pain. It was truly weird. I could then hear musical tones with my ears and a high pitched whine with my left temple. This, I imagine, was the ultrasound/vacuum combination as it was occurring. At this point, I couldn't see anything (my lens was gone). More deeply uncomfortable pressure while the new lens was inserted into my eye. And suddenly it was over! They removed all the equipment and I could see out of my left eye, clearly, for the first time in months. I sat up and spoke with the Dr. V. for a moment, then he was off to do it to someone else (I think they have two rooms for this and he shuttles between them). It was probably less than ten minutes from the time I walked in to the time I walked out.
I was prepared to walk home, but they insisted that I have someone there or at least a cab. This thwarted my original plan of eating breakfast at the mall. I cabbed home and then spent the rest of the day marvelling at my new-found vision in dim rooms. My eye was still noticeably dilated when I went to bed fourteen hours later.
During the followup the next day, they dilated my eye again, but not so much. Dr. V wasn't my followup physician, since he was doing more surgery. I did talk to one of his colleagues. Apparently I made an impression on Dr. V. since I was one of his Lasik patients seventeen years ago, and probably one of the first to also have cataract surgery. Also, the rapid nature of my cataract surprised him - it had gotten considerably worse in the three weeks since I was diagnosed, and extracting the lens was difficult because it had hardened so much. It's nice to know that I wasn't just in denial about how bad my eye had gotten - it really had gotten bad fast. Another week and I would have said fuck it, I'm going full pirate eye-patch. My eye-patch would have had a little Jolly Roger on it.
Thinking back, I believe it started last summer. I remember that shoulder checking left was difficult because of glare. I suspect that was the first hints of fogging.
So I can see now. And being a 21st century Canadian, fixing it was simple, easy (for me), and free. I'm deeply grateful for this and I know that not everyone on this Earth is not so lucky as me. I threw a bunch of money at Seva Canada to spread my privilege around.
One final bit of good news: While it's too early to determine what my eventual glasses prescription will be, for now all my old glasses work again. I'm really hoping that's where I settle.
I was also anxious because someone was going to stick things in my eye, and remove key bits of it.
So quick background: Cataracts is a disease of the eye's lens, the part behind the cornea/iris/pupil. The tissue gets made wrong and turns into a cloudy hard substance instead of the clear and flexible substance that it normally is. The current fix is to dilate the holy hell out of the eye so the iris is out of the way, then stick a tiny ultrasound/vacuum into the lens, liquify it with the ultrasound and suck it out with the vacuum. Once that's done, an artificial lens is inserted into the space left behind. That lens isn't perfect, but it's pretty good - I'll just need glasses to read or to see far away. Basically, I have a focal point set a few feet ahead of me. Perfect for working on a computer.
I walked to the clinic and got put through the conveyor belt. At one point I speak to the anesthesiologist, who gives a squirt of some anti-anxiety med under my tongue. He also checked out my vitals with some monitor that measured blood pressure (a little high), pulse (normal) and oxygen (dead average). Of note, the machine could also measure "pain" according to the user interface.
"Hey, the screen says 'pain' - what's it measuring when it does that?"Thanks for answering the question in your head rather than the question I asked. I still don't know, and I even asked a Doctor.
"It doesn't measure pain - it's measuring your BP, pulse, and oxygen."
"I get that it's not doing that right now, but when it does do that, how does it do it?"
"I told you, it's your blood pressure, pulse and oxygen."
I did find out that the method they use for measuring oxygen was first developed for Japanese fighter pilots in WWII so they wouldn't black out. That was cool.
Naturally they put a local anesthetic on the eye. This removes pain, but notably doesn't remove other sensations. They said that I'd feel pressure and it might be uncomfortable. I liken this to the dentist saying something might pinch. They're not wrong - they're just really underselling it.
So here's how the procedure went. I laid down and they made me comfortable. Then they put a cloth over my face that had a hole cut out for the eye (I was asked at each stage which eye, which reassures me - not exactly something you want them fucking up at). They then clamped my eye open so like in A Clockwork Orange. Dr V. came in and described what he was doing in "you're going to feel X" terms just before X occurred. I felt a sensation on my eye that was deeply uncomfortable. You know how uncomfortable becomes pain when you turn it up past a certain point. Well this was uncomfortable well past that point without the pain. It was truly weird. I could then hear musical tones with my ears and a high pitched whine with my left temple. This, I imagine, was the ultrasound/vacuum combination as it was occurring. At this point, I couldn't see anything (my lens was gone). More deeply uncomfortable pressure while the new lens was inserted into my eye. And suddenly it was over! They removed all the equipment and I could see out of my left eye, clearly, for the first time in months. I sat up and spoke with the Dr. V. for a moment, then he was off to do it to someone else (I think they have two rooms for this and he shuttles between them). It was probably less than ten minutes from the time I walked in to the time I walked out.
I was prepared to walk home, but they insisted that I have someone there or at least a cab. This thwarted my original plan of eating breakfast at the mall. I cabbed home and then spent the rest of the day marvelling at my new-found vision in dim rooms. My eye was still noticeably dilated when I went to bed fourteen hours later.
During the followup the next day, they dilated my eye again, but not so much. Dr. V wasn't my followup physician, since he was doing more surgery. I did talk to one of his colleagues. Apparently I made an impression on Dr. V. since I was one of his Lasik patients seventeen years ago, and probably one of the first to also have cataract surgery. Also, the rapid nature of my cataract surprised him - it had gotten considerably worse in the three weeks since I was diagnosed, and extracting the lens was difficult because it had hardened so much. It's nice to know that I wasn't just in denial about how bad my eye had gotten - it really had gotten bad fast. Another week and I would have said fuck it, I'm going full pirate eye-patch. My eye-patch would have had a little Jolly Roger on it.
Thinking back, I believe it started last summer. I remember that shoulder checking left was difficult because of glare. I suspect that was the first hints of fogging.
So I can see now. And being a 21st century Canadian, fixing it was simple, easy (for me), and free. I'm deeply grateful for this and I know that not everyone on this Earth is not so lucky as me. I threw a bunch of money at Seva Canada to spread my privilege around.
One final bit of good news: While it's too early to determine what my eventual glasses prescription will be, for now all my old glasses work again. I'm really hoping that's where I settle.
