Jul. 8th, 2014

jamesq: (An actual picture of me.)
Back in university, I ran a Call of Cthulhu game set in the modern world. The PCs were part of a private investigation firm, and they were called upon to discover the origins of this charming creature:
a beautiful bouncing baby monstrosity from beyond space and time

The client assumed it was genetically engineered, but this being CoC it was actually much worse than that.

At one point, the PCs have infiltrated the industrial complex where the thing came from. They were also being pursued by the sort of security guards who worked for corporations that weren't just run-of-the-mill evil, but full on worshipful-of-super-natural-horrors evil. Which is to say, they were the shoot-first-and-don't-even-bother-with-questions sort. Shots were fired and the PCs managed to get to the end of a long, dark hallway were a set of stairs led up to a laboratory. The lab was full of these things in big glass jars. Watching them. Screeching. Kicking at the glass.

CL got the bright idea to push one of the jars down the stairs towards the oncoming security guards.

"Ok, with a big shove you push the cart containing the thing towards the stairs. You see it begin to topple over as you slam the door to the lab shut and jam a chair under the door handle to brace it shut. You hear it crashing and bouncing down the stairs and it ends with a smash of thick glass. You then hear screams, both human and not, followed by a lot of gunfire. Eventually the noise stops."

"So it's safe to go through that door now?"

"Whatever is on the other side of that door probably isn't going to be glad to see you. Just sayin'."

"Right. Let's go out the other way."
Later on they encounter something bigger and scarier than the thing in the jar. It drives two of the PCs out of their mind - one permanently (goodbye PC) and the other one temporarily (though they don't know that yet). AY is that insane character.

"It occurs to you, in your insane state, that every time you run into one of these sanity-blasting monstrosities, that CL is around. Why, it's like he's leading you to them deliberately."

"Well, it's kill or be killed I guess. I shoot him with my shotgun."
The other PCs wrestle the gun away from AY at this point and make a hasty retreat with a quick stop at the emergency room to get CL some desperately needed medical care. That injury plagued him through two whole campaigns, because this is CoC, where there is magical healing, but you don't want to use it.

After a few weeks off while CL recovered in the ICU and AY recovered in a padded cell, they were back at it. However, CL never trusted AY again. AY felt that was a little harsh.

"Come on, you know I was insane when I shot you."

"Yeah, and good role-playing demands that I react like you're an insane person who shot me."
Later, outside of the game, CL comes up to me (we shared an office in the university, so out-of-game discussions happened all the time).

"I want to modify AY's guns so that they won't fire. Can I do that?"

(secretly thinking HELL YES) "It's possible. It will take some stealth rolls and some mechanical repair rolls. I'll let you do it over the next few game sessions so that he doesn't notice."
I'd more or less decided that he would succeed, because of the lulz.

Some months later they were visiting the wilderness retreat of a missing body-builder whom they suspected of learning (and applying) Things Man Was Not Meant to Know to her body-building regime. They figured that she was physically large and strong, but they weren't counting on her being a fifteen feet tall killing machine.

AY was the sort of character that really really liked his guns. All RPG groups have them - the guy who wished he was a commando bad-ass and always memorized the weapon tables and carries more guns on their person than a SWAT team. When that character type sees a psychotic, fifteen foot tall ogress charging the party, they say things like this:

"I pull out my double-barreled shotgun loaded with deer-slugs and do horrendous damage to her knees!"

"The hammers fall with a clicking sound, but the expected blast doesn't happen."

"I pull my 45 from its holster and empty it into her."

"It too clicks repeatedly, without actually firing."

"Oh god! I reach into my boot and grab my 22. I empty it into her."

"Sorry. The giant woman reaches you and backhands you effortless through the air."
At this point CL chimes in.

"I'm starting to think that filing down AY's firing pins might not have been my smartest idea."

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