jamesq: (An actual picture of me.)
I have what I call "pee dreams". Basically, if my bladder is full in the middle of the night, my subconscious will try to tell me by making me want to go in my dream. However, I'm not actually able to go (being in bed in the waking world), so the dream plays out in a very frustrating way.

I'm usually in a large building like a shopping mall or similar complex, and I look for a bathroom. All of the bathrooms are unsuitable: They're either occupied, or they have no privacy, or they're broken. Imagine a crowded changing room there all the stalls have had their walls removed. Or the walls are only two feet high. I end up searching high and low for a proper bathroom, never to actually find one.

So I've been trying to spot these occurrences in the dream so that I can say "a two foot high stall divider in a room full of my bullies from junior high is an improbable occurrence - I must be dreaming. Time to wake up."

I almost succeeded last night. I thought "a wall of out-of-order urinals beside a public swimming pool is an improbable occurrence. It's like those pee dreams I have, except I'm awake. I'd better saddle up my velociraptor and look for another swimming pool."

Sigh. Almost there, brain. Almost there.
jamesq: (An actual picture of me.)
The first dream was simply a well detailed, very erotic dream, about a girl I have a crush on. This is only the second time that's ever happened, and the first time was about twenty years ago. It ended much to soon.

The next dream I was on a cruise ship and had an impossibly tiny cabin that I shared with five strangers. Due to it's cramped size, I spent most of my time in the public areas. There I saw numerous SCA folks of my acquaintance (in their normal garb) wandering among the other passengers. The other passengers didn't seem to care, or even notice, the strangely dressed folks in their mist.

One of my bunkmates turned out to be named Irene, and she had enemies who were looking for her.

The final dream I was back at my parent's house and there was a burned out wreck of a car sitting on the neighbour's front lawn. Examining it, I see that it's made up of my own car, and the parts of another car. The fire isn't completely out yet so I fetch our garden hose and bring it over. Along the way, I see that the other half of my car (and the other half of the parts of the other car) are kinda/sorta assembled in the back lane in a way that suggests malice rather than mechanical aptitude.

I spray the first wreck just as the fire department arrives to deal with it and QC is one of the fireman. I take him to the back alley to show him the other wreck and somehow meet up with LA and RT. We get to the back to see that someone has also surrounded the car with colourful tombstones. The tombstones all name Irene. Upon seeing the name, it all makes sense to my dream self.

Me in the waking world? I haven't a fucking clue who Irene is, or why she's so universally hated. Frankly, given the subject matter of the first dream, I'd rather not have any more dreams featuring Irene.

Last dream ended at 5 am, so I got up 30 minutes before my alarm.
jamesq: (Default)
Some emo-ish discussion of what the difference between hope, dream and fantasy is, and how they apply to me... )

Now it's possible I've completely misunderstood the point of this exercise. If so, here is what I currently hope for, with a bit of detail:
  • A romantic partner - A woman not too dissimilar to me in age, who is reasonably intelligent, funny and good looking and has some commonality with me.
  • I'd like to get to a point where I have more leisure time to enjoy life. This requires me removing a fair amount of debt so that I can reduce how much I work. Probably not going to happen in the next five years, but it could happen in ten.
  • I'd like to get to a healthy weight.
  • I'd like to get to a point in my life where my mental problems no longer overwhelm me.
jamesq: (Zoidberg)
What's noteworthy about this dream is not the content, it's the fact that I remembered it enough to relate at all.

I was at a big SCA event and in this dream-time the SCA operated differently: Everyone came to this one big event to see all the kings and queens from all the kingdoms get elevated to the throne in one giant ceremony.

I was watching the festivities when they started calling names for An Tir. Nobody went up (I later discovered it's because everyone else was late for the ceremony). Finally, they asked if anyone from An Tir was present. I was the only one, so they hauled my ass up on stage and planted a crown on my head. Suddenly I was King. This was cool for about three minutes and then I wanted out.

By this time, others from An Tir had arrived and were all congratulating me. But something was bothering me. Some niggling little detail that I was sure made all of it moot.
"Wait, isn't there some obscure rule that says you have to win a Crown Tournament to be King?"
There was a lot of muttered discussions and people were flipping through tome-like rule books.
"I think he's right - I think you do need to win a Crown Tournament," said a random SCA policy wonk.
"I won the last Crown Tournament - I guess that means I should be king now." said one knightly-fellow.
"Cool. Take this," I said, handing the Crown to him with much relief.
And that was that.

It's also noteworthy because you couldn't imagine anything like this happening in the real SCA. Peoples' heads would explode if some random guy got crowned because the rightful heir was late for the ceremony.

I'm not sure what this dream means, so I'll just say it's about sex. Any dream you can't interpret is probably about sex. The only exception is that dream I have were I'm standing in sort of sun-god robes on a pyramid with a thousand naked women screaming and throwing little pickles at me.

Nightmares

Oct. 8th, 2008 01:37 am
jamesq: (Default)
I just had a nightmare. It was somewhat more intense then the ones I get occasionally. I don't remember my dreams normally and this one is quickly fading. I remember that it was scary and that the nightmare figure was something like (but not exactly) Heathy Ledger's Joker. We'll call him Clowny.

I know that Clowny did something evil and was now threatening me with it. Which leads to the two things about the whole experience that really disturb. First, I was sitting on the steps at my front door, marking this the first dream/nightmare I can recall in my home. Normally, they are either in some nameless dreamscape, or they're set in a surreal version of my childhood neighborhood.

Second, I remember being paralyzed, which I understand is common for some night terrors. I struggled to wake up and ran head-long into the typical sleep paralysis that keeps everyone from thrashing around constantly in response to our dreams. Normally it shuts off before you wake up, but in this case it lagged behind waking by a few seconds. Waking from a nightmare, a few seconds seems a lot longer.

I got up, moved around a bit in an effort to shake the cobwebs from my mind, even going so far as checking my email. I went back to bed and just felt claustrophobic. Now I'm avoiding it (for a few minutes) because I really don't want to go back to sleep, but I'm desperately tired. I know this because I'm having trouble typing - I keep going back to fix typos.

Hopefully this post has purged my mind sufficiently to go back to sleep. Time will tell.

(and my goddamn shoulder is aching too)
jamesq: (Serious)
So I'm dreaming. I'm at an outdoor mundane event dressed in a suit and tie and I'm bringing a tray of food with me to sit down. I do so at a long picnic-table style bench. Ned Beatty is sitting beside me.

I turn to look at something that distracted me and as I turn back I see that Ned is stealing some of my croutons. An argument ensues. Ned tries to justify himself by saying that croutons are insignificant, so I should not worry about it. I say that's not the point - if he wanted some croutons he should have asked first. He runs off.

Later, Johnny Depp sits down and we look at each other and realize we're twins! Seems Ned was filming a scene from a movie when he grabbed my croutons. He ran off because I wasn't responding with Johnny's lines.

The scene then shifts slightly (or more likely shit happened and I can't remember it). There are now five Depps. Myself, actor-Johnny, Random-guy-Johnny, Psychologist-Johnny and (get this) Mountie-Johnny. Seems we're all brothers, or clones or something and we all just happened to be in these fairgrounds at the same time. None of us had ever met before.

As near as I can figure, last night's dream was written by Charlie Kaufman.
jamesq: (Default)
So there I was on the motel balcony, chatting with Christopher Walken's character from Blast From the Past. That's when the Telletubbies appeared from a hole in the building's outside wall. They were a lot smaller then I thought they'd be - like an infestation of rabbits. They frolicked on the motels wide green lawn. I said "ball ball" to them and they fetched me a small Nerf football to play catch with.

That's when my alarm went off and I woke up.

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